According to http://www.thefreedictionary.com/, a breadwinner is the one whose earnings are the primary source of support for his dependents. Therefore there’s more pressure on his shoulder than the rest of the family members. He has bigger responsibility hence he should have the courage and determination to live not for his own but for the benefit of those who depend on him.
Since when my elder sister got married, I took the sole responsibility to support my younger brother and sisters in their studies. All three of them are in college. I can really feel the pressure on my shoulder where there were times that my income was just enough for them and for my personal expenses. In other words there’s no other way to save a little amount for my future. There were times that I’m tempted to eat at a fastfood restaurant when in a moment I thought of something that was more important than my own satisfaction. There were times that I really want to buy a pair of shoes and jeans only to realize that I don’t have enough money to buy them. I cut unnecessary expenses. I preferred cheap rather than signature clothes. Many times I just ate bread at lunchtime just to make sure there’s enough money in the next days. Many times I don’t take break. Many times I declined gimmicks and invitations just to save my money. Many times I borrowed money when budget got short. And I am proud to say that I have very generous friends who trust me despite my situation. Many times I cried before going to bed asking God why things are like this, why I am the one who’s experiencing this? And the list goes on. These are only some of those countless experiences.
However, amidst all these struggles and tears, I still have the feeling of satisfaction. I am so grateful to God for allowing me experienced them. I thank Him for giving me the courage and wisdom to bear the daily pressures and challenges. I am thankful to God for giving me the chance to witness by myself how beautiful my life is. I always feel loved and blessed by Him, by my family and the people within my circle. God is so faithful in blessing me with very diligent siblings and just last first week of December our family was able to produce another professional when my younger sister passed the Licensure Examination for Teachers (LET). All the pains that I experienced before and are experiencing now are all worth it. If I don’t have this relationship and faith with the Lord maybe at the very beginning of my career I already got lost. Maybe I’m not where I am now. Maybe I already gave up.
Isaiah 58:11 says, “And the Lord will guide you continually and satisfy your desire in scorched places and make your bones strong; and you shall be like a watered garden, like a spring of water, whose waters do not fail.
I believe that those and these experiences are just part of my whole life story. I believe that they only represent a little portion of the kind of life that God has prepared for me. I believe that in the near future all these will serve an inspiration for myself and to others to continue life because life is so beautiful, life is precious. Finally, I don’t need to worry because the Lord is my guide, he knows my desires and dreams, he will strengthen and mold me along the way so that at the end of my journey I shall see myself inspiring others, giving them hope, fulfilling my mission and living with God in eternity.
Our God knows what’s best for you and me. Let’s just keep the faith and live with it. To God, be the glory!
Thank you and may our God continue to bless you in a very special way. See you at my next blogs!
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